Unrequited Love

“You fall in love with people’s minds. I’m going to lose you to Henry,” said Hugo, ‘Henry and June’

anais-nin
Anaïs Nin’s Portrait by Waldo Saavedra (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

Whenever I miss him, I  usually go back to Anais Nin. My piano has failed to cure me, on the opposite, my sad thought of him failed my piano practice session. I  was playing Michael Row the Boat Ashore, Somewhere My Love, and Alla Tarantella, and the thoughts of him kept coming back. I  played the piano, the thought came, then I  had to stop. I  went on, the evil thought came, then I  stopped. I  now left the piano stool for good.

He’s not in love with me, and I couldn’t make him does. I  used to think, confidently, that I could seduce him with my words. It’s proven that I  couldn’t. I’m not good enough of a writer. I failed. How sad, and hopeless.

Anais Nin, on the contrary, reaffirms me that sentimentality is not at all a bad thing. Anais’s words and writing are full of emotion. Anais turned sentimentality into art. Anais is my idol.

I now have Henry and June opened by my side. “The men I have wanted, I couldn’t have,” wrote Anais.

“A few days later I met Henry. I was waiting to meet him, as if that would solve something, and it did. When I saw him, I thought, here is a man I could love. And I was not afraid.” – Henry and June

(Today’s Prompt: Ruminate)

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